How does God respond to our attitudes towards life’s gifts and challenges alike? Imagine getting a friend a present. Imagine that person’s face has a puzzled expression when she opens it, or she says it isn’t her size, or she tells you it isn’t something she can use. Picture her mask genuine disappointment. Now imagine your friend’s face light up, she gives you a bear hug as soon as she pull away the wrapping, or a big smile broadens her cheeks. How do you feel with each response? While you may have gotten them the gift to make her happy, her response will inevitably affect you. The first attitude might make you feel that the thought and time you put into the gift are unimportant, that your gesture of love and generosity are meaningless, and that you don’t want to give that person another gift. The second response makes you feel she appreciates your time and generosity, makes you feel a genuine connection and joy with that person, and makes you want to seek out more things that might bring her more delight.
It is easy to imagine God might respond the same way. If we respond to the events in our lives and our situation by saying, “This isn’t what I wanted,” or “I’m tired of this,” or always find a way to focus on what is not good enough, what is not right, what is here that we don’t want, and what isn’t here that we do want, then we are limiting God to work in our lives. While these responses are natural and we will often feel these emotions, we are multiplying the trouble that is already here. God is not likely to send more blessings and good things, and he is less likely to go to the store to “pick us up” gifts in the near future. While God wants to bless us, He can only do so if we let him. One word of caution, however, a lot of people see God as some kind of “cosmic vending machine,” and this isn’t His nature. He is mysterious, but it is pretty easy to figure out from scripture, common sense, and experience that he wants our praise and appreciation.
If God gives us something that is difficult and painful, something that we genuinely don’t understand, what do we do? If we give a person a gift they might not be able to use, they may show genuine gratitude that we took the time to be thoughtful and tell us “thank you” with a genuine smile. Later, they may pass the gift on to another friend who can appreciate it, or they may donate it to charity. They may also creatively adapt the gift in some way so it can be useful. While we cannot literally pay forward what God has given us if it isn’t a material object, we can pay forward to others the wisdom and strength that difficult situations produce. We can provide our experience and compassion. While we may not understand the whys in our situation and we may cry out to God for strength and guidance, we can ask God for the best benefits the difficulty can bring, so it bears fruit. We can thank and praise God in our difficulties, even if we are not quite ready to thank god for our difficulties. As the Apostle Paul points out, thanking God “in” our difficulties makes us content.
Proverbs 23:7 states: “As a man thinketh, so is he.” In order to be grateful, a feeling may not automatically wash over us as we get out of bed every morning. We must cultivate an attitude of gratitude for it to resonate in our lives and become an unconscious response. Waking up in the morning praising God for all the good things in our lives, material or otherwise, will set the day in motion in a positive way, and push the dread and fear of the day away. You may wake up feeling groggy and depressed, but that is NOT how you have to feel all day. Go through the Bible and other books and find all the positive scriptures and sayings you can, especially in the Psalms and New Testament, and ones that resonate with you. Write them on paper and note cards, and put them by your bed. Before you get out of bed each day, pull out the cards and say them several times each, with emotional strength, giving each your full attention. Those two ingredients are important to create results. If you are not aware of what you just said, or if you do not say each with emotion, they won’t create the power they have the potential to release in your life. It does take effort and cultivation. If you say them with feeling and gusto, they will resonate throughout the day, you will start to believe them, and you will find yourself come to them again and again. I use this method myself, and more times than not, the days I do it, I feel better and things go more smoothly. The days I don’t, especially for weeks in a row, I seem to have more problems and have more problems with my attitude and emotions.
Scripture seems to reinforce the fact that that our thinking multiplies what comes into our lives, either positive or negative: “To him who hath, more shall be given; to him who hath not, more shall be taken away” (Matthew 13:12). Taken at face value, this verse seems unfair. To someone in a difficult situation, it might even provoke anger. But I think that it means if you believe that you are richly blessed and deserve good things, even if it that deserving is through Christ, then you do, in fact, have a lot of good in your life. If your belief is what makes things so, then you do have a lot. And as a result of having a lot by belief, you will be given more rich blessings, material and spiritual. If you believe you are in lack in many areas of your life and choose to focus on that, you will then believe that is true for you, like “calling those things that be not as though they were” (Romans 4:17). As a result, more lack will come into your life, so believing that you are blessed and a blessing, and being grateful, are important. What you believe multiplies, so consciously choosing positive thoughts is important.
Even during difficult times, it is amazing the tiny details we can thank God for throughout the day. When it is hard to find things to be thankful for, here is a little trick: look for little reliefs, pleasures, conveniences, and mercies all day long. We all have them. And without chastising yourself for not being perfect, you are starting to think more positively. Out of your difficulty, what things do you feel a leaping desire to do? What possibilities bring your joy when you think about them? Even desires can be something to be thankful for if they are good and right. If they are good, and they make you happy, why not dwell on those?
Recently, for example, I experienced a strong desire to travel and see parts of the country and world I haven’t had an opportunity to see. I also have a long time dream of a beautiful piece of property in the country with lots of animals, a white house with a wrap-around porch with beautiful landscapes and trees. Sometimes I retreat into these visions for a moment or two, seeing the green leaves shivering in the Northwestern breeze or watching the sun sink over the horizon from my white house’s porch. Are blessings more likely to enter your life by enjoying desires, the thought of them, and how they make you feel; or are they more likely to enter your life if you are discouraged, fearful, and hopeless because they are NOT in your life? They are more likely to come into your life by enjoying the desire and thoughts of those things. By thanking God in the now for what you have and are yet to have, you feel better, and your attitude is more pleasing to Him. And who knows? You may be increasing your chances of changing your circumstances, so giving yourself the gift of gratitude is a win-win.
